After her open heart surgery and subsequent hospital stay, it took many many months before Iz would sleep alone. Nighttime and naps, she had to be as close to me as possible. Eventually, she would nap alone but the dark of night was a no go for her. But as her nightmares became more and more rare, she began to sleep on her own for at least a few hours at night.
And then came her hospitalization for rotavirus. We backslid an entire year and were back to the high anxiety and panic attacks and needing me right there to sleep. Fortunately, her emotional and mental recovery is going much quicker this time. She still has her panicky moments and there is still too much crying when I need to do things like use the bathroom and clean on my timetable instead of hers but she will go hang out with people besides me for short periods and will sometimes play happily while I am on the other side of the baby gate.
Sleeping, however, seemed like it would take another year to get better. Some nights it wasn't even enough to be snuggled up against me, she had to lay on top of me. Not good at all for the back :p But the alternative was nightmares and gut wrenching screaming and end-of-the-world-type crying. Some back pain and not enough sleep was preferable to seeing her in such distress.
Her crib has not been used in several months so we changed it to toddler bed mode. In this case, just one side comes off so its like a toddler daybed. Our bed is rather low to the ground so I put her bed up against the bed. Her bed is slightly lower than mine and it makes a rather cozy little space for her but she can easily get in or out on her own by climbing onto my bed. Honestly, I viewed it as a sort of bed rail. She could sleep next to me and I wouldn't have to worry about her rolling off the bed because the slight drop into her bed isn't even enough to wake her if she rolls over into it. I did not expect her to sleep in her bed. I expected her to continue trying to become one with me by getting as close as humanly possible.
It has been about a week since I put her bed against mine. She has slept in her bed every night. I don't know what it is but she is happy and sleeping fairly well and I'll take it!